When my gym membership ran out, I decided to do the budget-conscious thing and start going on daily walks and eat healthily. Two weeks later- my weight, blood-pressure and stress are all on their way back up to the rarefied reaches of the stratosphere. I also stopped shaving, going out in daylight and sticking to my work schedules. Needless to say things have been less than optimal. So today, I’m back at the middle-classy gym down the street. Bugger the expense; it’s better than dying. And, talking about croaking, my first day back was a mixed (paramedics) bag. My physical strength is about the same. (I am still easily able to manhandle the leaves off the odd lettuce). But, and this is the frightening bit, my heart-rate now sky-rockets doing the aerobic stuff. This is also frightening for other gym users and the staff as I keep catching worried glances. Is the fat nerd going for an MI? I also think that the female users think of me as some kind of sweating, panting pervert, but that may only be universal single-guy paranoia kicking in.
What have I learned from all this? Well, have you ever looked in those leaflets they have in every doctor’s office in the world. How they explain, in user-friendly prose, that getting fit need not be expensive or require a gym? They lied.
Whatever. Cue Rocky music.
Incidentally, I hate whiskey, but have a bit of a pesky, punning problem (and an alliteration ailment).